Thoughts roll like waves
Crashing against the shores of my mind
Then like a flash! from a photo bulb, I return
To the voice telling me to focus
Urging me to finish this meditation
When all I want to do
Is hidden within me
Emotions overwhelming
Still trying to find the better life
Waiting for me
If I can only focus...
I am the mother now
As I brush away the tears that stain my pale cheeks
I am the mother now
My hand is the only comfort I feel as it caresses my face
I am the mother now
My family tree is diseased and rotten
I am the mother now
Because there's no one else who wants the job
The eruption within bursts forth
Chaos pouring out in all directions
Rivers of lava pool and fall
As I weep by its unforgiving banks
Unable to control the panic
Unable to control the pain
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We argue and we fight
Late in bed at night
Wanting the madness to end
Looking with confusion at my best friend
I love you, I think in silence
Hating all this violence
Finally, we hug and part ways
Not to be talked about for days
Why must we continually hurt each other
While we claim to love one another?
Hands clasped
We sway to the rhythm
Of our breathing
We are of the same flesh
We cry out together
As we meet in the middle
In groanings that cannot be uttered
I gave you my fragile heart
I warned you to be careful
You snatched it from me
Turned it around in your hands
Appraising its value to you
You smashed it on the ground
Picked it up, and dusted it off
Gave my damaged heart back to me
"I was trying to ignore you," you admitted
As the first tear rolled down my cheek
I am a total loser
That's all I'll ever be
Everything I want in life
Wasn't meant for me
I am a total loser
But could you love me still?
Life's hope dwindles deep inside me
Can't make it up this hill
The way the picture was hung
I could watch you fall
There was just too much
Spilling over frantically
Chaos unleashed
We are the same
I was so lost
Oh so lost
In a forest full of darkness
Tripping over branches
Trying to find the light
My heart is a mess
I reach inside
To discover a fire in my soul
I find a break in the trees
And I know I am home
She lands next to me
Colorful wings wet with morning dew
She touches the flowers before her
Their color brightens instantly
Each day she brings her blessings
Into the lives of
Everything she touches
Blessings that are mine
God,
I know I'm just a little person
On this big, blue planet
I know I am only 5 years old
Maybe that's why I don't understand it
The way my mommy yells at me
And my daddy too
I know I am only little
Sometimes I don't have a clue
I hope that you can see me
I hope I could explain it
Why I need Your helping hand
From this big, blue planet
We kiss
You pull away
It's always the same
The passion and the release
The moment goes away
And I can't tell
If you love me anymore
Or if this has all been a dream
Of my own device
Sunlight breaks through the cracks
As it illuminates the dark recesses
Once not seen by human eyes for centuries
The artwork is impeccable, gothic
The beauty we miss
Right in front of our eyes
The door opens and I rush toward you
Our secret room, our secret place
A hidden bedroom behind a wall
Greeting one another with love and gladness
Before we fall into bed
Into each other's arms
I am the only one out here
In this icy wonderland
Waiting for the world
To make sense again
You said you would be here
By my side
Fighting the good fight
But somehow believing in them
Seemed easier
Than standing in the cold
No matter what happens
I must not fall
Jumping from one lily pad to another
Trying not to slip under -
Until I do.
Baptism of water
I jump back on the lily pad
Now I am whole again
This is not the same living room
I had to see it for myself
This looks almost pleasant
How many people you must fool
Into believing this is not
A house of horrors
The signal is fading -
You are fooling no one
This is not the same living room
I had to see it for myself
Floating in the water
After I sank overboard
The lapping waves surround me
As my rescue disappears in the distance
I am forgotten and lost
Floating in the water
I look up at the brightness that blinds me
Shrouded in light
Heaven coming down
Some saving at last
In this old Midwestern town
There is a house within a home
How much I wish I could step inside
Just to feel less alone
In this old Midwestern town
My mind is in a zone
The streets should be bustling right now
Yet I am the only one
My latest published work about one family's experience with love, loss and trauma over four generations. Available at Amazon and other r...
